What is the most dreaded question people can ask you in a conversation? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 05:59 AM Thread Starter
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What is the most dreaded question people can ask you in a conversation?


For me it's this one. What are you doing in life, what are your plans?
It happens more than you think especially during job interviews. I never know how to answer them because I'm not doing anything and I don't have any plans either. It gets me nervous instantly. It feels like everybody in the world has this vision for themselves and they have it all planned and can see it happening in their minds.
People dream of having kids, making big trips, having promotions, have a big house, nice garden, buying this or that, going to concerts/festivals, starting a company, running marathon, lose weight, get fit etc etc
I literally have none of those, yet people expect everybody to have a vision for themselves, how they see their life and how they will achieve it.

I 'm so jealous when people suddenly see the skies clear and have an ephipany to know what to do in life. I know these guys who were aimless like me and suddenly after a holiday one of them says I'm going to be sailor and 1 year later he has succeeded, he has a life, earns money. Another one was just failing at exams all the time then suddenly decides to become a cook and now he has a restaurant. A third one I know was on the path of self destruction, having no real place to live, no money, no degree and suddenly 2 years later he has bought a house, wears fancy suits and knows nothing but success in life.

It's so weird but especially frustrating. I can't see myself ever having one of those moments where everything becomes clear. It seems I don't enjoy anything.
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post #2 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 01:00 PM
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"What are your long term goals?"

Or "what's your five year plan?"

Because, if I were being honest, I want to live alone in an apartment or small house and make enough money so that I can pay bills and come home every day and play some video games after work. I have no ambitions and I think most of my dreams are dead lol. I also tend not to agree with societal definitions of what a successful person is. My maybe one day dream is to be a published author, but I don't really have any ideas as to what sort of book I'd write. That's about all of I've got going for me. I used to want to get my phd and become a college professor, but seeing what professors go through in their field, and that it would require me to overcome my SA which in reality may never happen, I don't have any desire to do that anymore. Just kind of want to go about my day, and exist in the present as much as life will let me but I'm not so good at doing it.

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post #3 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 01:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by conantheworthless View Post
It's so weird but especially frustrating. I can't see myself ever having one of those moments where everything becomes clear. It seems I don't enjoy anything.
Finding something I enjoy and could see myself committing to is problematic for me as well. I find that anxiety sucks the enjoyment out of life.

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post #4 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 01:28 PM
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I don't like any questions about romantic endeavors/relationships, in my work environment etc, cause if I say I have minimal interest & zero experience at my age, people look at me differently, as if I'm some sort of deviant & don't take my opinion about anything as serious & some of them are very persistent & won't let it go, relationship status is most people's whole world & they can't seem to comprehend that I don't really care all that much XD






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post #5 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 01:46 PM
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I can't think of any question I would dread. But job interview questions are annoying. Like when they ask "where do you see yourself in 10 years?" I don't think I can give an honest answer that is also a good answer. I don't know where I'll be in 10 years, I could be dead in 10 years for all I know. It's too far to say. I'll have to google the best answers for job interview questions if I get an interview.
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post #6 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 02:14 PM
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Do you have any kids? I hate that, because I would have really liked to have had a family.

Nobody loves me but my dog, and I think he might be jivin', too.
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post #7 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 02:27 PM
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I once got asked what kind of biscuit I am most like (this was in a job interview). Looking back I think it was suppose to help us relax???

I have considered, in depth, the answer to this question and have concluded there is no biscuit quite like me.

In general, I don't mind been asked questions at all, I just go blank when its my turn to ask them.

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post #8 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 02:54 PM
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post #9 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 09:44 PM
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The only question I really fear is: "What are you writing?" Haha. I don't like lying, but I don't want to get into a huge discussion about the merits and morality of writing despicably filthy porn for a living.

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post #10 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 09:47 PM
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post #11 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 10:13 PM
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Can't even write it in this thread haha.

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post #12 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 10:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by truant View Post
The only question I really fear is: "What are you writing?" Haha. I don't like lying, but I don't want to get into a huge discussion about the merits and morality of writing despicably filthy porn for a living.
Oof that would be my first question if someone told me they were a writer.

My dreaded question is what my professional history is. Though I've worked for a while now, I jop hop a lot across companies, positions, and industries. I have breadth of experience but zero depth, and it's embarrassing because I'm a master of nothing at 27 years old.
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post #13 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 10:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leaf in the wind View Post
Oof that would be my first question if someone told me they were a writer.

My dreaded question is what my professional history is. Though I've worked for a while now, I jop hop a lot across companies, positions, and industries. I have breadth of experience but zero depth, and it's embarrassing because I'm a master of nothing at 27 years old.
Ouch, if I were asked that question I would either have to deflect it or admit I have absolutely none and never came close to any.

My most dreaded question would be, "What did you do for a living?"

...you gotta keep the goal in mind, develop tunnel vision to a certain extent. it's hard, and it's not for everyone.

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post #14 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 11:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leaf in the wind View Post
Oof that would be my first question if someone told me they were a writer.
Yeah, it's first thing everyone asks. I don't mind: "What do you do for a living?" It's the question that inevitably follows. I tell people I write freelance articles. Which is also true, just not where I make most of my money.

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post #15 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 11:25 PM
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Anything about my future plans, or my relationships "Are you married/Have a boyfriend?" and also the MUCH dreaded "Do you have kids?" and feeling like I have to explain myself at all. For the Significant Other/Kids questions there's almost ALWAYS a follow up such as "Why not?" or "Don't you want one/them?"

People are just too nosy. lol. I get that most people my age either have one or both, and they're just trying to make conversation, but it's just too much for me. Plus, the kids one is sensitive, especially if someone has trouble or can't conceive, it's not really something I'd feel comfortable asking someone personally. Plus, they're not what everyone wants and it still weirds me out the amount of backlash a person gets for saying they don't.

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post #16 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 11:30 PM
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People tend to not ask me questions. People tend to make plans for me and expect me to just "drink" whatever bizarre concoction they've mixed up. They also tend to do this without my having asked them to or without my knowing they're doing it. So I'm always in dread of whatever next weird predicament I'm going to find myself in next.

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post #17 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 11:53 PM
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"Where do you want to be in 10 years?"

Errr.... hopefully still alive?
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post #18 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-20-2019, 12:51 AM
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Job interview questions are the worst and the most cringe-worthy but besides that:

What do you do for fun?
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post #19 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-20-2019, 01:23 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by komorikun View Post
Job interview questions are the worst and the most cringe-worthy but besides that:

What do you do for fun?
I went to work laboring for a factory once or twice where they ask me about my hobbies along with "Where do you see yourself in five years?" I wonder, "What in the flying **** do you care??" I'm gonna break my back for your BS *** business to pay my bills while you make 3x more money than me to do nothing but recruit suckers to put through a tedious hiring process before you grant them a crap job. I can't stand formal HR interviews and the bureaucracy gate keeping over crap labor jobs. Where do I see myself in five years? Not working for you, man.
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post #20 of 48 (permalink) Old 07-20-2019, 02:37 AM
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Life plans, so “what are your goals?”, “where do you ser yourself in so many years?” & anything to do with sex or relationships
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